Jokes

If you think you’ve learned all the jokes there is out there, wait until you get a load of entertainment the people of this African nation called Nigeria have up their sleeves.

Some of these jokes sprung from life experiences and the fact that despite all tribulations, the people always

Nigerian Jokes The Rest Of The World May Not Understand

1. If Traveling is free, you’d never see me again!

2.  Girls will be holding pizza box as if it’s a land document

3.  Some guy is somewhere telling my future wife, “good night my sweet angel”

4.  They will be slaying and all these girls who can’t cook will be like…, “honey come and taste if this water has boiled.”

5.  No matter how tired I am, seeing my President on TV always gives me the strength to get up and change the channel.

6.  We’re like a pencil in the hands of the creator…Fat girls are markers.

7.  He calls you an Angel but only invites you at night, girl! are you an Angel of Darkness?

8.  Finally! I found my soul mate. Thank God I didn’t give up searching, the stupid hair cream is under my bed.

9.  Kissing under the rain is so romantic. Until thunder fires both of you.

10.  Dating a married man is fun until you realize he saved your phone number with ‘engine oil’

11.  I say she’s my sister and you’re like oh really? Are you both related by blood or…? No oh, we are related by Zobo!

12.  I can’t wait for my Pastor to say, “Do something crazy for Jesus!” I will carry the offering box and run away.

13.  A relationship problem can make you finish ironing all your clothes only to discover you didn’t switch on the electric socket!

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14. Now that all the slay Queens has turned make-up artists, who will roast corn for us this rainy season.

15.  Beating your woman is wrong, Save your strength…Just hide her make-up bag.

16.  I don’t date guys who don’t have cars,” says a chick who bath with a soap till it becomes the size of a SIM card

17.  Can someone please send 500k into my account, I want to check if my alert is still working.

18.  And so I was hanging out with my boyfriend on Friday night and he turned to me and said, “who do you think will get married first?  me or you?

19.  So you had sex with him because you both have Chemistry, when Biology happens, I hope he has the Economics to take care of you.

20. Neighbours will always see any lady or guy you bring home, even @ midnight, but they’ll never see the thief who stole from your room that hot afternoon.

21. There are two types of noses, pointed nose and disappointed nose. Which one do you have?

22.  Now that rain has fallen, it will take NEPA 2 days to dry the wire…

23.  You love being black, yet you complain of racism. Let me ask, why is white soup more expensive than other soups? Is that not racism?

24.  I became a CEO in SS1 when my teacher said: “Ify and company leave my class.”

25.  Someone said short girls cheat a lot because they think no one is seeing them.

26.  She said “Hi sugar” and I said “Hi milk” then she blocked me…I thought we wanted to make tea.

27.  If she prefers you buying roasted corn and coconut for her than Sharwama, she’s the one you’ve been looking for bro.

28.  Nigeria is the only country you need not set an alarm while sleeping…Just sleep, your problems will wake you up.

29.  Most ladies don’t answer video calls after 9:00 pm, because by that time, their faces have been restored to factory settings. True/False?

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30.  Continue saying all men are players, Maybe you will marry a referee.

31.  If his phone rings and he goes out, babes follow him to help him find a network.

32.  Please, am I the only one afraid of pronouncing HUAWEI PHONE in public?

33.  Those of you forming ORAL ENGLISH, Until you stop pronouncing “GOD” as “guard” Your prayers are going straight to security guards.

34.  Tissue papers are made for slim girls…Fat girls should use calendars, posters or even cement bags.

35.  When Girls with big lips peck you, it sounds like screenshots.

36.  Welcome to the season of smooching, squeezing, licking, sucking and getting dirty. Don’t tax your brain so much, it’s Mango season.

37.  If you have a problem with people moving about, holding their car keys in their hands, then feel free to swing your public transport fair just for show off too. Let’s not complicate things.

38.  If you feel jealous each time your friends progress…Come close, closer, now say after me, “I am a witch.”

39.  It’s only in Nigeria that someone will remove his glasses just to hear what you’re saying.

40.  Men are the best cooks ever, just two eggs, a banana and some milk and it satisfies a woman for nine months..

41.  The reason why men are still important is because vibrators can’t pay the bill or buy drinks or recharge cards.

42.  If you like post 1 million wedding photos every Saturday, I don’t plan to marry the wrong woman.

43.  Job interview for a security guard in Nigeria –
Interviewer: Can you speak English?
Job Seeker:  Will the thieves come from England?

More jokes will be coming your way soon, so stay with us and make sure to share with your friends on social media. Enjoy!

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